One of the most prevalent traps in current thinking is, the grass is greener somewhere else.
Most of us have experienced moments of seeing the other person’s lot as better than our own, and the list is as long and as varied, as you wish to make it:
‘Their job is better, easier, pays more, and is more interesting. Their marriage is happier, sexier, less stressful and more loving. Their children are better behaved, more polite, smarter, and more helpful. Their house is better, bigger, smaller, cleaner, more relaxed—and on and on’.
If our mind is set in that direction, we will always find something or someone whose grass looks greener. However, believing in the illusion of greener grass leaves us feeling hopeless and dissatisfied. Believing in that illusion, we’re blinded to the possibilities which exist in every moment.
We have talked often, in this column, about the inside-out nature of our experience—what you think is what you get. There’s no more powerful example of that, than the grass is greener syndrome.
When we buy into our thinking of greener grass, we’re supporting the idea that something outside ourselves creates our well-being. We become enthralled by the idea of if only—if only I had greener grass, then I would be happy.
Once we’re onto the fact that life truly is an inside-out experience, and that it’s our perception that creates the movie we’re living; then we are able to catch ourselves sooner.
The moment we feel our mood dropping and feelings of frustration and dissatisfaction start to appear—we can stop. Take a deep breath, and know that, behind this imaginary reality we’ve created, lays a deep pool of well-being. Herein lays our common sense and wisdom.
The truth is, there’s no way of knowing someone else’s reality. However perfect another’s situation may appear, we can’t know their reality, and how they are experiencing life as it unfolds for them.
Statistically we do know that wealth, fame and beauty can’t ensure happiness—the only true source of happiness, is our innate health.
Green grass only grows in our imagination—understanding this sets us free.
No longer are we held hostage to the illusion of greener grass, our level of gratitude and contentment can now continue to grow.
Wishing you all the very best for the New Year.